Who Needs to Confess? And What?
Actress Ashley Judd recently disclosed that she was sexually abused as a child; American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi recently disclosed that she was sexually abused as a child; Senator Scott Brown from Massachusetts recently disclosed that he was sexually abused as a child. When each made a public disclosure, the media described these disclosures as “confessions.”
Actress Ashley Judd recently disclosed that she was sexually abused as a child; American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi recently disclosed that she was sexually abused as a child; Senator Scott Brown from Massachusetts recently disclosed that he was sexually abused as a child. When each made a public disclosure, the media described these disclosures as “confessions.”
Wendy Murphy writing for the Patriot Ledger in Quincy, MA, has lifted up this important observation: “confession” or “admission” conveys that the victim of abuse was to blame—i.e. that he/she has something to “confess” responsibility for. This characterization is totally erroneous.
In April, which is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, it is particularly egregious to continue to see the media distort and dismiss the experience of victims. But it is this kind of distortion that led me to write Sexual Violence: The Sin Revisited.
Let’s put this discussion in a faith context because “confession” carries overtones of religious teaching and significance. Those of us who are Christians are called upon to “confess” our sins, our actions that have done harm to others. This would be the task of perpetrators of child sexual abuse, not their victims.
Sadly, many times a child or teenager has gone to a priest or pastor and “confessed” sexual contact with an adult or older teen. They believe that because the contact was sexual, it was sinful and their fault. Their “confession” is actually a disclosure and a call for help.
If the priest or pastor allows it to remain a “confession” and it is unlikely that this allegation of child sexual abuse will be reported to law enforcement, which is what should happen. The faith leader should guide the young person to understand that there is nothing to “confess,” but there is something to report. The faith leader then should stand beside the young person to prevent future harm and call the perpetrator to account.
If a perpetrator comes to a faith leader, there is much to confess and usually to report to law enforcement as well so that we do what we can to prevent further harm to other young people. The perpetrator then has the opportunity to repent, to “get a new heart and a new mind,” according to Ezekiel, and to make restitution to the victim/survivor.
The concept of “confession” is very helpful when addressing a person’s behavior that is harmful to another. Let’s just be clear about who needs to confess and what. Victims have no need to confess.
Rev. Dr. Marie M. Fortune
FaithTrust Institute
www.faithtrustinstitute.org
Confession
- Marvin Eckfeldt